she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
Girl farted next to me in class and then denied my high five
My vagina hasn't been this smooth since I was 8. I better get laid tonight.
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
I just found a half a joint in my bed. . .don't know if this qualifies as a proud moment or a cry for help
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Randomize
