you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
Smoked Hookah in the playhouse last night. Childhood was so fun.
Also. When I die, I'm gonna have them put me in the casket naked and then have an open casket funeral. That will be my last chance to make people uncomfortable.
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
Stop recording sex noises and setting them as my ringtones. This time it was at a funeral
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
Randomize
