We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
Bartender at the wedding asked if he was making my drinks too strong. I laughed at him.
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
Randomize
