i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
My life is like a drunken tornado. All over the place and never passing up fat girls
I saw a picture of my dad holding my legs in a kegstand. Town festival=success.
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
Me: 10% human, 90% poor drunken life choices.
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
I need to stop getting so drunk at bowling
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
Randomize
