thank god he doesn't hang out with everyone else i've had sex with
well, yeah, he can't fit the whole neighborhood in his apartment
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
So yeah, turns out I enjoy vaguely public group sex. Who knew?
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
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