Joe is yelling at the trees again.
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
Randomize
