the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
that's an acceptable place to lick
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
just cuz theres a goalie doesnt mean i cant commandeer the goal and become a way better goalie
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
Hey can you text me Heidi's phone number. I just stapled her mattress to the wall and I want to send her a picture of it.
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
what the fuck happened to the tacos
I need your help immediately! I sorta kinda sliced my foot off at the ankle with my new kitana. Bring your cooler, ice and some hospital road beers.
Randomize
