So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
There's a knife in my toilet. And I meant to ask you last night if you got a hair cut?
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Randomize