I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
When you told me you were coming to my show, I didn't know you were bringing Satan and Brokeback Mountain with you.
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
my mothers day present is going to be not puking at the table during brunch
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
You gave me a bottle of tequila and introduced me to a ginger named cowboy. I actually love you.
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
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