like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
i tried giving myself a bikini wax.1. i hate you 2. i think i'm dying
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
Because you hugged a homeless guy, and I paid him 5 bucks to give us our giraffe balloon animal back. That's why.
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
I would never blame a unicorn for anything.....how dare you
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
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