So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
What do you think that old couple was thinking when they saw me puking in the QT parking lot at ten in the morning?
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
NoShamevember. You game?
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
Randomize
