At least make sure they are 18
Why
9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
Just realized I'm going to have to make you sign a non-disclosure agreement before my wedding.
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
She has the best kind of daddy issues
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
Randomize
