She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to hit on someone with another guy's semen in your hair. not even at ihop.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
Michelle asked what I was wearing tonight. I responded with a g-string and plastic wrap. I've gotten no response since.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
Ya, It's probably because whenever I close my eyes I see a kitten playing a banjo.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
Dude I just woke up with a dog sleeping on me.
I thought you didnt have a dog??
Exactly.
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