Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
I need a new pic for your contact id. Because your boobs popping up when I'm having dinner with my grandma or, ya know, when kids have my phone isn't so good.
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
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