I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
No we didn't have sex. I got my period on his finger.
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He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
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Eating my shrimp pasta on the porch with a 40, wearing a Hawaiian shirt, proclaiming "I GOT SCRIMPS." I just jumped the shark of college.
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
Hey my vagina is like a company. Everyone has an equal opportunity....
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
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