So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
My mom seriously just told me my insurance company pays for rehab. In an email. I expect a real, not just us joking, intervention coming on. I'm not accepting a "lunch date" with that bitch.
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Yes.
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
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