What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
My booty call fought through ice and a foot of snow to get here. He brought booze, food, and cigarettes for three days. My vagina is the greatest motivator of all time.
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize
