We named our party play list daddy issues
How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
Also got home. Still stoned. Mom was up. We made a pizza and were writing a children's book. Sleep good.
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
DR UNK TOWN USA
TEAM USA GO AMERICA
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
We were making out and truffle butter was playing in the background. I stopped mid make out session and said, "I'm really sorry but I have to rap Nicki's part."
I can't believe I'm going to buy bitcoin to pay for erection pills
Randomize
