Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
Banging your ex-girlfriends best friend 3 days after you break up is like saying "fuck you" with feeling. I wouldnt have it any other way.
Pretty sure I went to the bar in my bathing suit, sweat pants, and high heels.
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
I went on a psycho cleaning spree so I feel I've earned the right to spend the day in bed watching porn and eating sausage biscuits. If you bring alcohol you can join me.
All other girlfriends are inferior. You are the chosen one.
Well, after a pitcher of beer, I set my ex on fire. It was a little fire, he's fine. How's your night?
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
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