i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
Overslept. So hungover. Apparently texting the first person in my contact list the time I would like to wake up is not how the alarm clock in my phone actually works.
He kept singing Happy Birthday to himself, yelling at the bouncers for not letting him in, and telling them his "father will hear of this." He was like a drunken Scottish Draco Malfoy.
Just used an eyelash curler to open my beer since I didn't have a bottle opener. Things are starting to look up.
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Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
Come on in and take your pants off
And it only took a fake engagement ring, a condom and a bowl of weed
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