that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
I hijacked a bellboy cart and rolled into the party dancing on it
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
It's weird having sex with someone you actually like
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