It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
final count. 18 beers. 4 shots baileys. 2 shots vodka. 1 glass champagne. vomited in the yard after losing my phone in a field for 8 hours. Possibly played tag with myself
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
no dude he sent me cemetery flowers, i know it. they are half dried out roses in the shape of a cross, seriously. and he is not religious. so he robbed a freaking grave site for me. am i like an accessory to grave robbing now??
damnit this is what you get for dating guys with neck tattoos
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
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