I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
So I just went to student health services and on my way in there was a girl outside on her phone saying "I just dont want you to be angry" and on my way out she was saying "I have the side effects sheet right here" Someone started the semester off classy
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
My male hookup buddy is gonna meet my female hookup buddy, let the awkward hookup games begin!
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
You know why nobody comes up with Sober October? Other than it's Oktoberfest? Because Sober October doesn't benefit anyone, just like your judgment isn't benefiting me. I'll talk to you in November. Unless you make up another alcoholless month.
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
Got high with dad and hunted squirrels in the basement. Is this seriously what my life has come to?
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
I ran into a wall that clearly had things popping out. My eyebrow was bruised, both arms, the bottom of my foot. Lost half of my finger nail, my fake eyelash was stuck in my hair and I have about 47 blurry pictures of a half naked zombie DJ.
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
Randomize
