How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think my nap took me to another dimension
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
Lost my anal v card with Peter Thiel's RNC speech on in the background. Unbelievably appropriate
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
Coworker just walked in thirty minutes late reeking like weed and clutching a handful of scratch-off tickets. Also, there’s still a stripper pole in my office. Happy Wednesday!
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