So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
Listen, I'm 30. If it doesnt involve a super soaker and some chicken wings, you can count me out.
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My dad is blowing up my phone with pictures from the midget wrestling match.
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
IT'S LIKE LOOKING INTO GOD'S VAGINA!!!!
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
Randomize