You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
flash back: i gave smirnoff to a group of children at walmart
k so who do I think I'm kidding applying to culinary school? I just fucked up a microwaveable pizza
I ishhh haha are u coming nack easyer?
the fact that I know you're asking me if I'm coming home for easter makes me believe I speak fluent vodka.
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
Shes sitting on the front porch puking in to the pumpkin she just carved...in the rain. I guess pumpkin spice tequila shots wasnt our best idea.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
Randomize
