im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
Nah, just ran around, pinned random men to walls, bit their lips of and booked it.
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
I would've fucked Winston Churchill - rode that D like I was going into battle.
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
Randomize
