Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
85% positive I just found a hair of a certain variety wayyy in the back of my mouth between two teeth while flossing.
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
Turns out lunch break sex with someone you cant stand being around for any amount of time just makes you wish you had gone to get tacos like you originally planed.
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
That's the 3rd time in 6 months I woke up on the hallway floor using a towel as a blanket, no clue how I got there. At least back when I was still drinking I could blame something other than myself for that kind of shit.
You should go to AA meetings and warn people about the dangers of sobriety.
the best part of christmas was when my mom opened the handcuffs that were supposed to be for jen. Surprisingly, not the most awkward situation of the day.
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
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