just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
my breakfast just consisted of gushers (made with real fruit!) and they're trying to tell me im not eating right?
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
Gonna bang his former student. Clearly I am winning this breakup.
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...
She's too awesome to dump: she gives me great blow jobs and free Popeyes. You just don't burn a bridge like that.
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
Randomize
