Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
I should have slept with you when you were wearing the gorilla suit. I've had dreams about your chest hair. I hope jail wasn't too bad.
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
I love how my phone automatically capitalizes Margarita. R-e-s-p-e-c-t.
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
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