you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
He asked if I was going to squirt out my bday candles. I'm glad the perversion doesn't stop for special occasions.
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
he is sitting in the driveway by himself laughing at nothing, idk what to do
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
Randomize
