come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
I think showering with 5 people and a half gallon of vodka was one of the best decisions we have ever made.
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
I JUST DEFLATED MY BOOB.
I DON'T KNOW WHETHER TO LAUGH OR CALL AN AMBULANCE.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
DON'T YOU TELL ME I HAVE HERPES ON MY BIRTHDAY. THAT IS MOST DEFINITELY NOT A HAPPY BIRTHDAY.
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
You made me take you back to Mcdonalds so you could yell at the guy for not giving you enough ketchup packets
I vaguely recall french fries...
You then proceeded to call your mom and tell her you weren't coming home because you were "tripping balls"
Sweet...
The seven of us sank the first paddle boat, but the second one was much nicer and we stayed afloat. Best night in a while, but we had to walk of shame for a mile.
Why are you rhyming?
Too stoned. That is how my thoughts are collecting.
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
Randomize
