He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
well, someone with very low standards is getting their dick sucked
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
you never texted me what you wanted from the store so I got a piece of chicken and bottle of tequila. if you want anything else you are on your own.
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
Let's celebrate that I used a condom
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
I mean we don't talk anymore but I still see him around wearing that sweater he stole from me after we had sex
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