I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
If my body was a temple, I pissed all over the front stairs last night..
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
Did we literally take a cab across the street
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
you were wearing a pair of wings and handing out McDonalds apple pies, if anyone refers to you as the "Rave Fairy" you now know why.
THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
For Valentine's Day I've purchased six lighters and I'm decorating them for him. I'm on a full ride to an art school and this is what I'm using my talents for. An intervention is needed. Please stop letting me date stoners.
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
I believe in your delicious
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
Randomize
