guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
so they are in my phone as twin 1 and twin 2. but i forget which is which. did i put them in order of who I hooked up with first, or who is sexier? cause i'm not trying to text the one with the girlfriend
1st off, theyre identical. 2ndly, have i ever told you that youre a huge slut? hope that helps
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some 6 yr old girl just got on my plane in St. Louis. She was wearing an I Love Canada shirt. She eyed the seat next to me and I stared her straight in the eyes and shook my head. Fuck her. Fuck canada.
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we should hire that guy that makes pancakes that we met last weekend for our next party. He can feed us, and regulate!
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
My girl friends dad just asked how I get so drunk and then he passed out with a bloody Mary in his hand on the couch it's 230 do you know where your parents are
Randomize