just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
you lied vaginas dont taste like gold fish!
noo i said youre golden if her vagina tastes like fish!
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
It’s gonna be hard being interviewed by this girl without remembering the time she showed me her nipple piercings at Dylan’s party
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
The highlight of my week is I found some hetero porn I didn't completely hate. Branching out.
Randomize