she looked like the bat from fern gully.
i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
Randomize
