Yours is on the dinner table...mine is in my underwear drawer.
she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
Randomize
