butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
No one appreciates an amoeba in a balloon hat.
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
found a note from drunk me saying "don't worry i fed the mice". WHAT MICE?
Randomize
