i just realized i've been trying to levitate the potatoe chip out of her hand for the past ten minutes. i think i smoked to much.
You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
studying for my Anatomy final and masturbating to Japanese porn are practically the same thing
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
He is getting married. In the time it took for this conversation he probably cheated on her three times
I think I should just be a madame. Fuck it.
I'm just gonna post fliers on telephone poles like, "who wantsta be a hooooooe?!"
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
Randomize
