Just soaked up some whiskey with a paper towel and then squeezed it into a cup for consumption. New low.
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
Theme for your birthday? Beer olympics in S&M costumes? Sounds like a nice little saturday
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
Randomize