Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
I dont know why I dont listen to you more often. He wont stop texting me. And his signature is "dancing with no panties on"
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
Randomize
