Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
All I wanted to tell you is that I fucked a guy covered in fake blood, who circumcised himself.
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
Is it wierd that you're going to be my best man and you've fucked my wife?
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
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