i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
You love me.
That's because, tragically, I adore whores.
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
If you're not going to call the girls I bring around by name, at least don't call them by number. It's been cockblocking since girl #47. Dick.
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
if you're the one who put those dollar bills in my bra last night, thank you because I just used that money to get myself a coffee
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
Randomize
