So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
Her directions to the house party: "the north star will guide you, turn left. I'm wearing the potato hat"
My TA just came over to give us drugs. Now he's drinking grey goose with my roommate and explaining his thesis to her. This is too much.
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
I told them the reason I passed out was because of "heat exhaustion." Not from showing up drunk. Good thing this is Arizona.
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
But break dance skills will only take you so far
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
I need to pull it together. I just cried my eyes out to Master Chef Junior.
we're at the bar celebrating my ex bootycall getting his new gf pregnant... and me narrowly escaping a future as kitty foreman
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
Randomize
