Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
What's a good pandora station to masturbate to?
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
nothing says "fuck you jocks from high school my life is better than yours" like bringing 5 grand in 20s to the bar
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
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