He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
When I wake up, please remind me why my shoe is in the toilet, my shower is filled with jello, and there is a naked girl sleeping on my coffee table holding a bag of Cheetos. that is all.
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
Randomize
