You're my little dorito
Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
then you put baby powder on the bottom of your feet and walked to your room so "ladies would follow the footprints"
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
I'm covered in sharpie and the girl next to me just said something smells like fried food. Hint: it's me. Why am I in class?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
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