Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
Remind me again why sleeping with a coworker and his wife would be a terrible idea.
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
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