writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
I can give you five reasons its your baby
and I can give you 10 reasons it's not, but I'm busy so I'll just go with you have the wrong number. And also I'm a straight girl.
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
You sent me a very drunk love letter
Was it the one about pterodactyls?
I was disappointed I thought you actually loved me
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