I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
I've gone to the bathroom 3 times. And forgot to pee. 3 times. Let's say we call it a night, I need to be found. I see a fish tank by the bar and some stairs.
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
Drinks appeared in front of me. Who am I to deny destiny? And by destiny, I mean free drinks, which appear by magic.
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
Just me, my martini, and my backup Martini.
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
Her cat was breathing in my ear all night, like that kid from Hey Arnold.
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
Randomize
