My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
I drank a girls breast milk at this wedding. Shit was next level
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
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